Archive for the ‘Stephen A. Smith’ Category

Stephen A. Smith Makes Me Want To Vomit
May 30, 2008

I know… what is it this time??

One year ago today, Kobe Bryant pulled his big douchebag move and demanded a trade from the Lakers.  Now, one year later, the Lakers are in the finals.  Now everyone’s blowing Kobe because he led his team to the finals… including Stephen A. Smith on ESPN Radio’s Mike & Mike in the Morning (audio link):

“I don’t think this has ever happened in my lifetime, not that I can think of.  I can’t think of anybody that had had such a complete 180 occur in their career.  To consider how despondent he was… you gotta remember I had spoken to him a couple of days prior to him coming on my radio  show last year and announcing to the world that he wanted to be traded and for exactly a year later to be in the situation where he’s the reigning league MVP… where he’s on his way to the NBA finals… where its entirely possible and likely that he’ll capture an NBA world championship just two months removed from leading the United States to a gold medal… considering all the things he’s accomplished and the metamorphosis that has taken place in regards to his image… I’ve never seen anything like it, I really haven’t.  But its a tribute to him… its unprecedented… its miraculous… but you talk about the American Dream and how anything is possible… definitely… when you look at what has transpired with him over the last year you can’t argue.  As Don King will tell you… only in America.”

Where do I start?

Kobe Bryant was an MVP candidate last year who led his team to a 7th seed.  Afterwards, he dickishly took his trade demands to YouTube.  This year, he won the MVP and led his team to a 1 seed. 

Where, pray tell, is the turn around?  Where, kind sir, is this miraculous, unprecedented American Dream? 

The Lakers, after improved play from Andrew Bynum, the return of a stabilizing force in Derek Fisher, and a trade that most people consider so lopsided that they half-jokingly called for an investigation… have made the NBA finals.  Turnaround? 

Dare I say that this was expected from Kobe Bryant and the Lakers? 

This wind-bag hyperbole fest is exactly why people like me hate Stephen A. Smith.  To flat out say that a perennial MVP candidate experienced some kind of metamorphosis simply because his GM had enough smarts not to trade him for pennies on the dollar is one of the most ridiculous arguments that I’ve ever heard.  Congratulations to Kobe for coming out and actually playing up to his potential after not getting traded. 

Stephen A…. that’s not a turnaround… Kobe simply did his job.  He had a great season.  He deserved the MVP.  His team dserved to be in the Finals.  But this was NOT a turnaround.

I guarantee you this:  Paul Pierce won’t get this kind of blowjob on ESPN if the C’s advance.  Meanwhile… he was the beneficiary of a similar trade… he also hinted at trade demands in the offseason… but he has ZERO championships… he didn’t force the trade of one of the best players of all time… and unlike Kobe’s Lakers… the Celtics were the SECOND WORSE TEAM IN THE LEAGUE LAST YEAR!  Yet, Paul Pierce rededicated himself to defense… accepted two superstars with open arms and played the most unselfish ball of his career… and when it mattered most… he out-dueled LEBRON FRIGGIN JAMES in the biggest game of his life. 

So Mr. Smith… when if you went this ga-ga over Kobe Bryant’s “turnaround”… I can’t wait to see how insane you get when it comes time to recognize what Paul Pierce has done.  If you care to mention him at all.


Character Guys
December 6, 2007

Who’s the latest douchbag athlete to put himself above his team? Jason Kidd wins that honor. According to the NY Post, Kidd was “on strike” last night. His official reason for missing the game against the Knicks was a migraine, but source say Kidd didn’t play because he’s pissed off, and wants a trade or contract extension. During a season in which we’ve seen Kobe Bryant, Stephon Marbury and now Jason Kidd attempt to hold their teams hostage, I want to praise our guys. Paul Pierce, KG and Ray Allen. They’ve played most of their careers with crappy teams and never made a peep. And now that they have a chance to win a title, they are all putting their egos aside. Thanks Danny, for not bringing a-holes like Jason Kidd to Boston.

Now on to last night’s victory over the Sixers. The first half was scary. The C’s were not playing defense at all. Hell, both Andres (Miller and Iguodala) were killing us. But Doc Rivers stepped in and saved the game.

“It wasn’t pretty,” Kevin Garnett said of Rivers’ halftime address. “What I love about Doc is that he’s not afraid to get on your (case) and tell you that you’re messing up.”

No. I am not being sarcastic. We need Doc to challenge this team on nights where they think they can just show up and beat a bad team like Philly. Thank you Doc.

Today’s Links: Doc writes prescription | Reserves go above, beyond | Tony Allen meets Doc’s challenge | C’s deep six Philly | Philly Daily News: New regime, old result | Allen, Pierce, Garnett make it work | Kobe/Iverson duel | Varajeo returns to Cavs

And finally, guess who won the Worst Sports Announcer contest? I’m just glad the rest of the nation realizes Stephen A. Smith is a jackass. Now if only the suits at ESPN and ABC would get a clue and kick this guy out the door.

A Tale Of Two D-Bags
December 4, 2007

Here’s the good news:  Celtics Dancers apparently date total tools… which really opens the door for a lot of us here at Red’s Army.  Our buddies over at were doing a casting call for hot chicks… and a Celtics dancer was there.  She was interested… they exchanged numbers… yadda yadda yadda… her boyfriend is a totally insecure douchebag:

Unknown Dude: Who are you?

Me: I’m Dave

Unknown Dude: Is this your personal line?

Me: It’s my cell phone why?

Unknown Dude: What’s your last name?  Why you calling Jen?

Me: Who are you?  

Unknown Dude:  I’m Jen’s boyfriend.  Why you calling Jen?

Me: Umm, for an ESPN casting call.

Unknown Dude: Oh.  She doesn’t want to do it.  (click)

Follow this link to see the whole exchange

stephen a. smithOh… and speaking of insecure douchebags… Let’s speak on Stephen A. Smith.  He thinks bloggers shouldn’t be able to reach a wide audience

someone with no training should not be allowed to have any kind of format whatsoever to disseminate to the masses to the level which they can. They are not trained. Not experts.

Hey Stephen A… how much training did you get before you got thrown on TV?  What’s that?  None?

Let me tell you something Stephen A:  There are literally MILLIONS of people who were trained in college to become reporters… specifically sports reporters.  And they’re NOT sports reporters now… because people like YOU are.  And I’ll also tell you this:  They’re trained NOT to yell every time they’re on TV.  Face it Stephen A., you’re a television failure, and now you need print media to fall back on.  Except… its dying… and it doesn’t pay quite like TV does.  So now you’re pissed that people like us come along and have a little following… further hampering your new lifestyle.  Well screw you, hypocrite.

I’ll Have A Ruben
August 22, 2007

 I’m not talking about the sandwich. That’s right, Ruben Patterson. Apparently he wants to come to Boston (Thanks to lb3 for alerting us to the story). Yup, the same Ruben Patterson forced to register as a sex offender following his guilty plea to attempted rape of his nanny in 2000. Let’s not forget the assault conviction for beating the guy who scratched his car back in 2001. He was busted a year later for felony domestic abuse (although his wife did drop the charges). But enough about the past, his worst days are behind him? This would obviously be a deal with the devil. But for just one year at the veteran minimum? If he causes one ounce of trouble, you simply cut him. He can bring some skills to the table, just ask him.

“You look at those squads (Boston and Miami) — where’s the stopper? The energy guy? The defensive guy? That’s me. I’m the only guy they’re missing.”

Will it happen? I would say the odds are 1,000,000 to 1 against it. We all remember Wyc freaking out about Telfair, and this guy makes Sebastian look like a choir boy.

In other news, there’s speculation that Shira Springer may lose her job on the Celtics beat. And here’s a reason to throw a party, it looks like Stephen A. Smith has been demoted. It’s about time one of his employers realized he’s a fraud.